It’s late February in New York, that dreary period just before the city comes alive in spring. It’s overcast; it’s windy; it’s bitterly cold, but that doesn’t stop my client from sporting a vintage Versace lace suit with nothing but a bra underneath. Her little dog, Nomi, is tucked away in a fleece-lined bag to keep warm after we were kicked out of a Columbus Circle shopping mall for taking photos (a common occurrence with my shoots—always seek forgiveness later, right?). After we covered the first part of the concept shoot, we descended into the lovely world of the NYC subway where we were joined by a mob of mustachioed, cross-dressing women. The subway car quickly cleared and boarding passengers at other stops peered in only to say “NOPE” and head off to an adjacent car as our mob made it rain, paying tribute to the incredibly talented artist that is Jacq the Stripper.
So excited with the shoot results, I had to sit down and start editing as soon as I arrived home—even though after a long day’s work I was exhausted. This is how I feel about most of my shoots; when I can tell a story and build your personality into it, I get invigorated. Many scenes over the past year come to mind: The dominatrix and her sweet submissive wiping up every step I took inside her apartment at the command of his Mistress and then dutifully driving us around Manhattan to get to our locations; the voluptuous Dixie De La Tour and I bribing our way onto a fireboat by feeding gourmet donuts to firefighters literally out of our hands; the incident when I photographed a client in lingerie on the Brooklyn Bridge and we got harassed by a prudish woman who called the cops ranting about “red hooker heels” and “setting women back 50 years” only to have two female officers respond to the jogger with annoyance and amusement. One of them shrugged, “It’s the Brooklyn Bridge, lady.”
Then there are the little moments on photoshoots that convey how comfortable my clients are with me as a female photographer—often before we ever meet. On my third-ever shoot for Inamorata, for example, I arrived on location to find my client answering the door completely naked, as if I were a friend already. Another time, a client was surprised by a monthly visitor shortly before our shoot and asked me to pick up tampons on the way. And you should hear some of the hilarious quotes that come out of photoshoots:
“Can you grab some ice? My nipples need a little more perk for this shot.”
“This necklace really makes my birthday suit.”
“Hang on, let me comb out my bush.”
And there are countless amazing quotes from my clients on Twitter, but here’s one of my favorites:
“I’m not a domme, but I want to make it clear [via Inamorata’s images] that I’ll pee on you and enjoy it.”
While NYC has been the biggest bitch I’ve ever had to deal with, it has also been the greatest teacher I’ve ever know. Thanks to this city, I’ve met New Yorkers who became some of the closest, most supportive friends I’ve ever had, and others who became the building blocks to Inamorata—and some of them were both. My professional and personal growth is intrinsically tied to this amazing city and the people in it, and I want to share my story with you:
Before I could even fathom the idea of Inamorata, I was getting out of a relationship that had financially ruined me. I was not getting the usual paychecks from my civilian photo brand, and I still had not moved out of my ex’s apartment because I couldn’t afford to. I felt so defeated. I started seeing new people in the messy dating scene that is New York City. One of my early dates was with a woman who, unbeknownst to me at the time, was in the sex industry. We hit it off, began spending time together, and as the relationship grew, she kept trying to help me find ways to bolster my income as I bounced from gig to gig.
A few months after meeting, she revealed to me her profession and recommended that I start photographing women in the industry as a means of getting to the next paycheck of my civi brand. But my civilian work was so different from the industry. Reluctant but broke, I agreed to do a test shoot with her, and she helped me build a client base. The first few months of shooting were half-hearted, as I only saw the cash flow, not yet seeing the creative potential this industry has to offer. Another hotel room in Midtown, another coffee shop in Brooklyn, another bookstore in SoHo—all my early photo shoots were just means of surviving and I was ok with that for the time being. The additional income allowed me to move out of my ex’s place, pay off all my debt, and finally afford the plant medicine therapy that changed my life in so many inexplicable and wonderful ways. In a matter of months, I let go of so much trauma; I let go of my ex; I let go of many other relationships that weren’t serving me; and I mended relationships that were the most important to me. I let love back in.
In that space of healing, I finally had the clarity to see what Inamorata could become. What I had fallen into, serendipitously, was a rare opportunity to work with independent women who can afford to bring our collaborative visions to life without the heavy hand of a corporation, a sponsor, or an investor. Inamorata was no longer a means of getting by; it became my passion.
As I started pouring my soul into new projects, I created strong bonds with my subjects. The overwhelming support I have received from the community and the camaraderie I have formed with my female collaborators resulted in the most amazing creative endeavor of my life. I grew confident in my work and trusted my own capabilities. And my passion began shining through my product. I started to capture not just sexuality, but also style, personality, and even humor. My photography wasn’t predictable anymore, even to me, as I allowed my creative expression to take on a life of its own.
Inamorata is no longer the choice for typical hotel boudoir shots. My clients choose me because they want something different; they want to reveal a persona; they want a story. I love to tell stories—and break out of my creative comfort zone. I want to keep growing and expanding and upping the ante. Leaving New York City is bittersweet and was not a decision I made lightly. I’ll be returning to the city from time to time to work with new and existing clientele. It’s the first place I’ve lived where I feel I left a lasting impact on those around me. Without Inamorata, that positive impact would have never happened.
So now I’m hitting the road, heading west in an Airstream trailer to tour the United States with my little dog (whom many of you have met) and my new partner. I want to meet and photograph clients in new locations across the South, the Midwest, the Southwest, and West Coast. I also just launched my Excursion Package, so now I’m able to shoot at locations off the beaten path, such as ghost towns, salt flats, waterfalls, and National Parks.
The growth of Inamorata is one of my proudest accomplishments, and I’m so incredibly grateful to all the people in this industry who have bet on me and trusted me with their vision. I look forward to pushing the envelope with my clients, and I cannot wait to create more magic together.
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